Monday, May 31, 2010

Ch 21: Hearts Broken by Betrayal

If you had been in Jesus' place (not if you had been Jesus), how would you have dealt with Judas?

I would have confronted Judas and x'd him out of the picture (as in he's not a disciple anymore). I think that's my initial answer and response.

To be honest, in the world, I can't think of an instance in which I felt betrayed. Maybe I didn't let others in that close to me? Maybe I was expecting it? Maybe I pulled away at any warning sign of impending betrayal? If I did feel anything leaning towards that direction (in the world), I would confront and then pull away or end the relationship. But because I'm in Christ and a new creation, I started thinking about my answer.

I am supposed to forgive Judas and still let him be a disciple. Love thinks the best. It covers a multitude of sins. Our ministry is one of reconciliation.

I can't imagine the pain Jesus went through in dealing with Judas. Eating together, praying together, traveling together and all the while knowing that in his heart Judas was plotting evil against him. When Jesus commands us to love our enemies, He can do so because He loved those that hated and betrayed Him. Lord help us!

In Christ, I have felt betrayed. As I have mentioned in earlier posts, anything that my husband would do that I perceived as a sign that he wasn't committed or where he failed to communicate effectively, I considered a betrayal. My fears about abandonment led me to go to the extreme on betrayal. Since the Lord has been ministering me in this area, I am starting to look at things in a different way, with His help.

I have to look at my husband as Christ sees him. In his heart he's not plotting evil against me. He loves me. I have to appreciate the work that Christ has done in his life and leave room for growth. I can't pull back and ending the relationship is not an option.

Sometimes dealing with betrayal is dealing with those closest to us. It's opening our hearts and exposing them. However, my hope or expectation is NOT in them. It is in Christ. He is my hope and I expect His Word to come to pass in my life.

Jesus dealt with betrayal. And so will we. Let's deal with it though as Jesus did!

9"Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. 10At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, 11and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. 12Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13but he who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.
Matthew 24:9-14

Friday, May 28, 2010

Count Your Blessings

Picture 19

1. When Hubby came home this Friday is was P-A-R-T-Y time...he's home for two straight weeks and 1 day!!!!!! And although we have some little odd and ends that have to get done around the house...he will rest in the name of Jesus...I trust the Lord will renew his strength and give him vigor!

2. Hubby had another class this weekend (it's still weird for us no to have him here with us on Saturdays, even if it's just one) and he got an A on his first paper!!!!!!!!!

3. Got so speak to Mami from Ecuador and she asked fro prayer for a vigilia she's having in the house on Saturday

4. Visited Abuela's on Saturday and she made a locrio for us and johnny cakes...she sent us home with 1/2 dozen too!

5. Enjoyed a wonderful and renewing time in prayer with my FIC!

6. I have finished a lot of our homeschooling planning for this upcoming year...I'm so grateful to the Lord because at first it seemed a bit overwhelming (this new curriculum has LOTS of information) but as I began I found it easy to do and was getting so excited for this upcoming year

7. Got to go to Michael's and saw this

it brought back memories for me: I did find what I was looking for a little project I will be working on...will post pics:)

8. The weather has been absolutely beautiful:)

9. Prayer on Tuesday was great! The children were determined to pray and call on the name of Jesus!

10. We received our wedding invitation to my BIL's sister's excited to go and see them get married in the presence of God!

11. I got on a cleaning streak...and the house feels lighter and lighter:)

12. Hubby was able to finish painting some things around the house and the kitchen is taking on a new look (not color:)

13. Got a great deal on a bookshelf for the girls room...I didn't know exactly how to decorate their room until I heard the Lord guide me to adding a splash of color with the bookcase:)

14. Really enjoyed fellowship with a FIC after Co-Pastor is the funniest sheriff I know and knows CPR:) but didn't get to use it on his most recent heroic encounter:)

15. My tot got some new pjs (which she's reallly excited about) and Hubby picked up his bike outfit from Target, so now he looks something like this on his bike

Just kidding!

16. Visited Abuela and got to congratulate Papo early on his earthday...Lord extend his days for Your glory in Jesus' name

17. Michelle & John blessed us with some coupons...thanks fam:)

18. Got some good samples and coupons for free items in the mail:)

19. Got some swagbuck referrals:)

20. God is awesome!!! This weeks I have seen Him deposit a peace that truly surpasses all understanding...thank You Father for the strength and determination that only You can deposit. We're in Your hands and trust You...Your promises are YES and AMEN in You!

Give thanks to the Lord and proclaim his greatness.
Let the whole word know what he has done.
Psalm 105:1

Thursday, May 27, 2010

BF Homework: Chapter 21

The weeks are just passing by so quickly. Chapter 21 already!?

Last week our hearts were being mended by truth- the truth about ourselves as parents. As I had commented on Sydney's post, it's so important that our children see break through occurring in our lives. Our example of freedom will mirror for them a genuine relationship with Jesus. We need Him for EVERYTHING! Confessing Him as Savior of our lives didn't end at the altar when we professed our faith, it continues daily depending on Him.

This week we're switching gears a bit. Last week we dealt with forgiving anyone who hurt us and also seeking forgiveness from our children. This week we're talking about betrayal.

To be honest, when I was reading this chapter I was like, "OK, this is going to be a hard one because I can't relate." But even that revealed something about me.

Betrayal can happen in different degrees so we're not here to categorize it in any way. We are not seeking to minimize or glorify it.

I had to read and reread this chapter and the Lord started showing me something beautiful. So this week we will answer the question:

If you had been in Jesus' place (not if you had been Jesus), how would you have dealt with Judas?

Our answers will be interesting and also revealing. An important statement Beth makes is that betrayal can either hurt and hurt OR hurt and help. Which one will you choose today?

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Switch Lanes

Rich boys have many toys

I remember when I first started driving, the fear and anxiety sitting behind that steering wheel.

I couldn't or wouldn't change lanes. The fear gripped me and kept me behind the traffic of the right lane to exit (and I wasn't exiting). I would much rather sit there frustrated, on the verge of tears (maybe I actually did cry) passionately explaining to my husband who sat in the passenger's seat, why I just couldn't but wanted to oh so badly to switch lanes. Over at the next lane, there was no traffic, just a lot of fast cars getting to their destinations. But me? I was stuck behind cars who were on their way to their destinations while I just sat there waiting and waiting. Stuck.

Aren't we like that at times. Stuck spiritually. Unable to switch lanes because we're gripped by fear. We see others racing on their way towards their destines. Others slowly embarking on theirs. But we're stuck just looking at them unable to move. We are not moving forward, can't turn to the side, and definitely don't want to go back. We're stuck.

Fear does not let us live out those good works that God prepared for us. Fear tells us,
"You can't"
"You'll fail"

But God's Word tells us
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
I am more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus.

We can't walk in faith and fear just like I couldn't very well sit there and switch lanes at the same time. A decision has to be made. Will I stay stuck or switch lanes? Will I stay stuck in fear or walk by faith?

So go ahead, turn that signal on. Let the world, the devil, and your flesh know you are switching lanes in the name of Jesus!
No more being stuck, now you're racing on towards doing the good works God prepared in advance for you to do (Ephesians 2:10)!

Monday, May 24, 2010

Ch.20: Hearts Mended by Truth

As I prayed with Hubby regarding our parenting, I felt strongly from the Lord that we (as a couple) must renew our minds.

First, I think that women and men get attacked heavily in this area. The devil tells us that we're bad parents, we're doing a horrible job, and any of our children's mistakes are a reflection of our parenting.

During prayer, the Lord reminded me that He is our Father. And my misbehavior is not at all a reflection of Him. Instead of thinking that we are going to solve issues in 30 minute segments as they do on tv, parenting is work. And lots of it.

We can be tempted to take the lazy approach and let them run wild only to yell them into obedience (fear) later. This method is easier but not Godly.

I want to renew my mind and know:
1. I am the mother God wants me to be

2. I am a work in progress--I am growing as a mother

3. My instructions can not come from worldly sources such as the latest psychology methods of parenting. My instructions must come from the Word.

4. Parenting is work. I must be diligent and consistent.

I pray that the Lord continues to help each of us to be who He has called us to be. I am sure that as parents, we've all made mistakes. But the beauty in the Lord is that we can repent and begin anew. We don't have to continue doing the same wrong things expecting different results because that's insanity.

God forgives.

God restores.

God makes new.

I pray that each of us will experience new relationships with our children, our husbands, our God!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Count Your Blessings

Picture 19

1. Visited a neighboring church that were celebrating their 11th year anniversary...
May they reach your vision for their lives Lord
2. Got up early on Saturday and was able to pray with Hubby before the girls got up
3. Spoke to Mami in Ecuador and my brother too!
He celebrated his earthday this week too!
4. Hubby didn't go to church on Monday and got to work on his paper
5. I am so thankful to You Lord that our tot asks to be read the Word...continue
to write Your Word on the tablets of her heart
6. I also thank You Lord that our tween worked so diligently throughout this
school year...all the glory is Yours...I trust that you will continue to strengthen
her for thus upcoming school year
7. Got a great deal on Kashi cereals at Target

all 5 boxes for $.97 and got a $5 gift card:)

8. Pastor sent us home with some mangos that Hubby really enjoyed
9. My tot actually told me, "Mom, I was lying, there is something
for me to do, you were right, I could clean."
...Praise the Lord for the conviction and repentant heart
10. Hubby got some great news from work...will disclose full details later
11. Got our final package for our homeschooling curriculum...
anything else is supplemental(s)
12. I was able to help Hubby work on his paper on Wednesday and
we had a good time having a live chat with Syd and her daughter
13. Visited Abuela and Papalito and Papo twice this week!!! We
had such a great time with Papalito laughing:)
14. Got some really good samples in the mail this week!!!

15. Was able to get started on organizing next year's homeschooling
schedule...although I couldn't use the Sharpies b/c they bled through
the page, I'll find some other use for them I'm sure
16. Got our free ice cream and carrots...thanks Maria:)

17. Hubby helped me alot in getting some homeschooling
materials scanned...thanks love:)
18.. The girls and I have enjoyed such great conversations
about the Word...increase the hunger and thirst Lord
19. My tween asked to homeschool her sister...continue to
increase the love and unity in their relationship Lord
20. Was able to get in agreement with my SIC and we do
believe Lord that Your will shall be done for Your glory:)

7"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8 (NIV)

BF Homework: Chapter 20

I didn't forget to post yesterday's assignment. It was on my mind to do it but I had a full plate so I didn't get to it. Honestly, more than just being on my mind, it's been on my heart.

I have been thinking a lot about the chapter's content.

Matthew 18:6 (NIV) states:

But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.

Now Beth, is using this verse in reference to those who may have inflicted abuse on us. But to be honest, as I kept reading, I just thought about me.

Am I that person causing one of these little ones to sin? Have I done, said, instilled, passed down something to my children to cause them to sin? I know that children soak up what they see, so I want to know whether I have consciously or unconsciously misrepresented sin to them? Have I given them the ok to sin with my attitude, emotions, or behavior?

Not only do I want to forgive anyone who has hurt me in my childhood, but I want to seek forgiveness as well.

This week's assignment is to pray. Forgive anyone who has hurt us or abused us but also to seek forgiveness. I believe that the Lord will show us if there is anything there where we have caused our little ones to sin. Then I believe, He will guide us what to do with that information. Some of us will pray and rebuke it. Some of us will talk to our children regarding it. Some of us will write a letter. Whatever the Lord directs, let's just do it.

Please let's not look at this assignment as "oh I am such a horrible mother." Let's look at it through the eyes of our Lord. Just as He wants to mend our broken hearts, He desires the same for our children. This isn't about passing judgement on anyone, including ourselves, it is about breaking free, forgiving, and being forgiven.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Staying Sharp(ie)

What am I going to do with all those Sharpies?

Fill in my homeschool schedule--color coordinated!

I think each subject will have its own color and then tests in red--real official.

Once it's all nicely done, my tween will also get a copy and then each copy will be put into our flex binders.

I am also really thinking about what do I want in our homeschooling area? Schedules? Tools? Organization?

Lots of things to get done before this upcoming hs year but I trust in the Lord, He will guide us and strengthen us and give us the creativity too!

What are you doing to get ready for this upcoming homeschooling year? What are some supplies that really are indispensable for you and what are some you plan on tossing?

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Dark Light


In the darkness of the night
it is not darkness that surrounds me
but Light
in the darkness I am exposed
in the darkness Your Light is revealed
Yes, even in the darkness
Your Light shines
Thank You for the darkness
For when it is dark
I can see Light

Monday, May 17, 2010

Scripture Memorization #10

38For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:38-39 NIV

Ch 19: Hearts Broken In Childhood

I'd like to begin this chapter's homework by stating that we've all gone through different or similar experiences, we've hurt and experienced pain differently and similarly. And the point of revisiting these experiences is with the purpose to heal and break free and not to judge or condemn anyone.

Think about your own childhood. Can you identify an experience that would be characteristic of God at work? Can you identify a handiwork of Satan? How has God used each of those experiences for your good today?

God at Work

One of my "best" experiences as a child were talks with my father. He would encourage me and tell me I had no limits. This opened up my eyes to seeing the impossible as possible. I didn't see limits or difficulties as a child. I saw potential and approached things as challenges to be conquered. The way my father viewed me and encouraged me changed the way I looked at myself. The so-called societal limitations (gender, ethnicity, economics) had no say in my future. My father told me I could do anything I wanted. He instilled this in me. This was the same man that when I was pregnant told me I could join the police academy:) Really to him, there were no limits.

How did God use this for my good today?

When I came to Christ and read the Word, I received it. Everything in it was for me. It was "easy" to believe what my Heavenly Father said about me because I had believed my earthly one. When I look back on those conversations with my father, I see God's hands all over it. Only He could have instilled in me those words that nothing was impossible for me and now that I am in Christ, with Him nothing is impossible.

Satan's Handiwork
My mother quickly became pregnant with me right after giving birth to my parents' second daughter. They were expecting a boy according to my mother because this pregnancy differed so much from her previous one. Maybe the arrival of another baby and baby girl #3 at that wasn't what they had in mind.

Throughout these last couple of days, I really didn't know what I was going to write about. But Holy Spirit spoke to my heart, "rejection." I thought on these things.

Growing up, I didn't understand the gap between my mother and myself. But even as a child, I knew there was something there. The enemy used this to make me feel different, awkward, and rejected. I grew up thinking that my mere existence was bothersome to my mother. This only became worse once my parents divorced. I felt like an outcast in my home and often isolated myself. I was a horrible teen and young adult. Often hurtful and spiteful to my mother.

How did God use this for my good today?
Since receiving Christ, I have spoken to my mother. We have asked each other for forgiveness. One of the greatest joys the Lord has granted me is being one of the instruments He used to bring my mother to Christ. He not only reconciled us to Him, but He also reconciled our relationship.

Words can not describe what He's done. She is my sister in Christ. We talk about the Word and pray together. She's my mother whose counsel is valued. She's my children's grandmother and to me she's the best grandma.

Honestly, I would not take back anything from what I went through to have what I have now. My only regrets were the pain I caused her. But Christ and she have forgiven me. Thank You Lord!

Looking back hasn't been easy. One of the things I dreaded was that for the most part, I don't remember a lot from my childhood. But on Saturday, as I prayed the Lord spoke to me:

13Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13-14 NIV

So that's what I will do--forget what is behind and strain toward what is ahead. I prayed that I would only remember those things that bring Him glory now!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Listening and Walking

That's what I'll continue to do--listen and walk.

Listen to the Lord.

Walk in the Lord.

This week has been a challenge to cook. Not for any other reason other than my body was tired. I was going through a week of going to bed late and waking up early. On Wednesday, I laid down to recharge and ended up going to sleep for the night at about 9:30pm. I can't remember the last time that happened.

But God is really just so good. Instead of dipping into my stash of prepared meals, He gave me the strength and creativity to cook every night except Tuesday when we visited my in-laws. I was surprised. Not that the Lord came through though.

I was surprised because I was (and part of me still is) asking the Lord for a more disciplined life. Not in a rigid schedule type but in a "normal" sleeping time (though I am not sure what that is in the Lord). A more disciplined "routine" for me really.

So Friday comes around and I have no desire to cook. At around a little after 5 o'clock my Pastor calls me and invites us to go to a church where he will be preaching. I'm thinking "uh oh gotta cook real fast." Hubby thinks he's coming home to work on his paper and try to get some rest.

Once I realize that our plans have changed, I start to think, "there goes my discipline." God answers, "Forget discipline and stay flexible."


When Hubby got home, I told him the Pastor's message and he knew we were going. So flexible. He didn't complain about being tired or the work he had to do. He just wanted a kiss from me and a hug. So flexible. He listened to my day and waited for a real hug. So flexible.

And that's so important in the Lord--to stay flexible. We may have plans or an idea of what we want to do but have we checked with God? Are those His plans for us? Is that His will?

I have truly been blessed at seeing the Lord make us but especially me, flexible. When you are stuck on your plans, you won't hear God's voice instructing you on His plans.

So I'll listen to Him.

And walk in Him.

The service was beautiful. You could feel the presence of the Lord. The Word ministered our hearts. The fellowship was great. And the tamales and coffee were delicious. Look at all I would have missed had I not been flexible.

So I pray that I may take heed to the Word preached.

I'll listen to Jesus.

And continue to walk in Jesus. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you and watch over you.
Psalm 32:8

Friday, May 14, 2010

Count Your Blessings

Picture 19

1. Enjoyed another night of great fellowship and the Word at our FIC's house...great punch and tuna Maria:)

2. My kitchen is clean (for the most part:)...the part I was dreading is all we have to do it minor things here and there
3. Girls surprised me with a beautiful bouquet...God continue to bless them with creativity in Jesus' name

4. On Sunday, God blessed us with double for children and one for parents...although both were received....Lord help me to honor and prune me!!!!
5. I received such a beautiful message from a teen...Lord may she know You!
6. The girls helped me to whip up a batch of carrot pancakes before they went to bed on Monday:) My tween is ready to move on from oatmeal...she actually wants to try farina:)
7. Got a good deal at CVS

($1.06 with $9 ECBs back)

8. Pastor sent us some yummy bananas:)
9. Visited FIL and God continues to work in the heart of my FIL...thank You for allowing me to see Your glory in his life
10. We got our math and science curriculum for our tween and it is in great shape...Elaine even through in some extras...thank You Lord for the favor
11. Have been able to maintain the house clean for God's's all about the maintenance;)
12. I so enjoy that my nephew asks me if I have the real red crayon (he doesn't consider violet red real red:)
13. I love it so much that my little tot enjoys playing with her she was walking around with her "sister" CeCe in a sling, her bottle, and diaper bag (she got the sling idea from her titi Michelle:)
14. My niece turned 13!!!! I declare her blessed in the name of Jesus richly and abundantly according to His will for her life in Jesus' name
15. My tot received a cute card from her cousin:)

10 I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;
I refused my heart no pleasure.
My heart took delight in all my work,
and this was the reward for all my labor.

11 Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done
and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;
nothing was gained under the sun.

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11

Thursday, May 13, 2010

BF Homework: Chapter 19

Chapter 18 Straight to the Heart did just that--went straight to the heart.

Sure, there are things we'd rather not remember and not think about anymore, but these places, people, and events have to visited in our hearts. The only one that can stop our freedom is ourselves. If we make the choice to hold on to these things rather than releasing them into the healing hands of Jesus, we will be held captive.

I can certainly sense Holy Spirit digging deeper in our lives. Maybe that's what this study should have been called, "Digging Deeper" because for so many of us we're like, "I've done this been there, cried and even vomited."

But He's digging deeper. He wants it all out, yes, even the residue. He wants to undo the effects of those chains in our lives to ensure blessed generations ahead. Isn't He just so good?!

His purpose is eternal not temporal. He's not into making us cry a little, renounce a little, confess a little so that we can make it through the next couple of months. He wants to change us into the image of His Son Jesus!

Remember that as we're going through Chapter 19. Let's also not forget what we've learned thus far. Think about our benefits and obstacles.

This week we will be answering Beth's question found on page 118.

Think about your own childhood. Can you identify an experience that would be characteristic of God at work? Can you identify a handiwork of Satan?
I just want to add as well part B to the questions above.
How has God used each of those experiences for your good today?

Now please pray for me. I don't remember LOTS of my childhood. I have asked God whether it's a defense mechanism or Him just erasing the files. So I trust, that Holy Spirit will remind me of what's necessary.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

It May Not Be New...

Old Bible

BUT it's new to me.

That was the thought I had regarding purchasing some of our homeschooling books used.

It may not be new, but it's new to me.

That got me thinking to the Word. We've read it and re-read it. Some of it, we've got it, like really got it, like there's only salvation through Jesus. Other things, not so much like anyone who hates his brother is a murderer.

The Word of God remains the same whether we have the full revelation of it or not. Whether we practice what's in it or not, the Word of God remains the same. So the next time you pick up your Bible thank God that it is not new, but it's new to you. Today, you can receive a fresh revelation. Today, you can find new strength from the Living Word of God. Today, it can be new to you. Today, you can be new.

Open my eyes that I may see the wonderful things in your law.
Psalm 119:18 (NIV)

Monday, May 10, 2010

Chapter 18: Straight to the Heart

Currently, how are you preventing Christ from binding and healing your hurting/breaking heart?

Last week, I had a cooking day. But instead of taking one day to prep and the other to actually cook, I did everything in one day. That day my girls wanted papi and mami. That day Hubby gets home and wants to go straight to bed but has reading for his class to do. That day I am looking at homeschool curriculums.

Well, when Hubby did get home, I could tell by his expression, that he didn't expect the girls to be up. There was a heaviness. But instead of calming things down and being a helper, something inside of me shifted. Instead of just communicating to him what had transpired during the day and what I still had to do, I got defensive.

And although, I got to finish the cooking, the girls went to bed, and Hubby read his book, I knew something was there. What was it, I was about to find out.

Days later, I hear Holy Spirit whisper, "Abandonment."
I knew what He was talking about but didn't want to confront it just yet.

Still after some time, I hear, "Abandonment." So I ask, "What is it that I have to renounce?" He answers, "Fear of Abandonment."

I go into our bedroom and communicate this to my husband.

Ok, why the long story? Well, to answer the question of how am I (how was I) preventing Christ from binding and healing my hurting/broken heart, it was pride. I didn't like to admit that someone else could actually hurt me. I'd much rather take it in and then process it, then pray and then leave it alone. But the Lord has been leading me to talk about the hurt with others and not just Him.

So what does this have to do with abandonment. Let me explain.
Whenever, I would sense my husband a little displeased or even with question marks on his face, I would shift inside. Communication lines were cut and walls went up. I translated any displeasure on his part as a sign of abandonment. Or really future abandonment. Instead of working on whatever I thought my husband didn't like, my attitude was more like, "this is it, take it or leave it. The girls are up, what can I do? They want papi and mami so what can I do?" Instead of saying, "Honey, they've missed you and got up when they heard you come through the door. Spend some time with them and then I will put them back to sleep."

I grew up in a house where love did not cover a multitude of sins. Neither of my parents served the Lord. I learned that if you don't like something in someone, you leave or you will be left. There was no let's work on it attitude. There was abandonment.

When I spoke to Hubby about this that night, I asked him to pray for me. We prayed and I asked him and God for forgiveness and I renounced.

Days later I was tested.

Holy Spirit was ministering me. I knew I had to communicate my feelings on a certain situation to my husband. How would he take it? What would be my reaction to his reaction?

Well, praise the Lord, I chose to do it God's way. And instead of just telling him my feelings in a matter-of-fact manner, I humbled myself and revealed my heart to him. I didn't have that take it or leave it attitude. I wanted to correct the situation together with him.

No abandonment.

Yes commitment.

God is good.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Count Your Blessings

Picture 19

1. Had such a blessed night with the children at Tuesday's prayer service
2. Received an update from our sponsored child in Lesotho
3. Had such a blessed conversation with Elaine...may the Lord continue to bless her
4. Mami is off to Ecuador for a looonnngg time but I know it's doing the Lord's will and He will protect and strengthen her
5. Went to a FIC's house for a home church service and the fellowship was GREAT!!!! Thanks Brother for the pancakes:)

6. Girls enjoyed fellowship with their cousins over the weekend...thank You Jesus for the nice surprise:)
7. Had my first official "cooking day" so no cooking on the weekends in May:)))))

8. Helped Syd clean up her house a bit and the results were beautiful for God's glory
9. Enjoyed a blessed conversation with my BIL whom I loved like my little brother before he was my BIL
10. A BIL blessed our daughter with a CD and we're enjoying it alot...thanks Alexis:)
11. Getting closer at wrapping up things with our homeschool curriculum...thank You my Prince of Peace
12. Got to see my Family in law (I so don't like that name:) and shared a testimony with Hubby's uncle and tot enjoyed her time with him..she has his dimple:)
13. Mama in law blessed the girls with some sandals and sneakers...thank You Lord multiply blessing over her
14. Today's Word was so good...Lord grant me a teachable spirit
15. My niece wrote us such a beautiful letter...Lord continue to use her for Your glory!
16. SIC gave me some coupons...thanks Maria...I will be enjoying our Ben & Jerry's and thinking of what a blessing you are to our are beautiful and there is no flaw in you (Song of Solomon 4:7)

You asked, 'Who is this that obscures without knowledge?'
Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me to know.
Job 42:3

Thursday, May 6, 2010

BF Homework: Chapter 18

Last week, we were basking in the knowledge that our God is the Ancient of Days. Before everything and anything happens (ed), He already knew. He is in control!

We looked at some wonderful Scriptures that reveal His loving care for us when we were not His children, and how those same Scriptures provide us with encouragement and security now that we are.

I pray that as we continue going through this Breaking Free journey, we hold on to the Word of God. As the Lord was ministering me on this week's chapter, I found myself finding comfort in one of my Scripture Memorization verses. And that's exactly why we're so blessed to have His Word. It's supposed to be our strength and shield, our comfort and joy! What a delight to just meditate on His Word and hold on to it because He is our Rock, our Fortress, over Help!!!!!

So moving into this week, let's do just that--hold on to Him (through His Word and Holy Spirit).

He's going to be digging deeper than maybe we would like right now, but let's trust the Ancient of Days. This too was written in His book concerning us--our freedom!

Currently, how are you preventing Christ from binding and healing your hurting/broken heart?

This one is really going to take some time in the presence of the Lord. Why? Because, I believe that naturally our first thoughts are, "I'm not preventing Him from healing me. I want to be healed." And while that may indeed be true, I also know that our hearts are deceiving and unless we come to Him and ask, "How am I hindering You, Your work in my life?" we will continue to live mediocre Christian lives. Always trying our best but never really doing our best.

So let's pray and ask the Ancient of Days to reveal how we are preventing the healing hands of Jesus Christ upon our hearts.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Cooking Day

So what did I do with 6lbs of tomato sauce?

Well, I did this:

2 lasagnas
3 baked zitis
3 tater tot casseroles
3 bags of burritos
1 container of beans
1 dish of extra ground turkey

The Glory is God's!

Lots of lessons learned in this one. Believe it or not but God used this experience to break me free of something. Find out what soon in the Breaking Free Study.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Can You Guess

what I did with is?

that's 6lbs of tomato sauce:0)

Monday, May 3, 2010

Chapter 17: The Ancient of Days

#1 How does knowing God is the the Ancient of Days encourage you? Provide 3 Scriptures that provide this reassurance?

1. Romans 8:28
28And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Knowing that God knows it all-my past, present, and future- and He's working it all out for my good is AMAZING! There are a lot of things that I can have regrets about concerning my past, and yet when I think that even those ugly things, He has worked out for my good, I see His love. I can see that hope and future He has planned for me.

2. Psalm 139:16

16your eyes saw my unformed body.

All the days ordained for me

were written in your book

before one of them came to be.

All my days have been ordained in His book before any one of them came to be. Nothing is going to happen to me that He doesn't know about and has not been written in His book concerning me. And because His will is perfect, all those things written concerning me are good.

3. Jeremiah 1:5

5“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,

before you were born I set you apart;

I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

He knew me and STILL chose me!!!! I see His love and mercy and great patience and long-suffering in knowing me (all of me) and still setting me apart. He wasn't embarrassed or disgusted by me, He chose me to be His daughter. Yes, I have a long way to go. Yes, I have lots of work to be done in me. But He still set me apart as His.

#2 If there is 1 thing (besides the salvation found in Jesus) that you could instill in your future generations what would it be?

That God loves them.

Looking back at my ancient ruins, a lot (if not all) of my poor choices, pain, and hurt were caused by the fact that I did not know that God loved me.

When you know that God loves you (I mean really loves you), nothing else matters, nothing takes precedence over that love. You don't have to be a people pleaser-you don't have to violate your conscience for the sake of fitting it. Not knowing that God, the Creator of heaven and earth, loves you leads you to seek it in other places that will only leave you with disillusionment. You'll end up feeling dirty and even more empty.

But God's love is not like that. It is pure and holy. It cleanses us and satisfies.

That's what I would want to instill in my future generations--God's love is sufficient. No other person or thing will EVER satisfy us permanently--ONLY HIM. Be filled with His love.

16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:16-19

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Scripture Memorization #9

Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom.

Song of Solomon 2:15

Monthly Round Up: April

Cleaning Up...that's the theme.

Early this month, I started really thinking about how our "school" area would look like for next year. One of the things that I like most about homeschooling is the flexibility. You may not even have a designated homeschool area. Learning truly does place anywhere. With that said, I want a landing place for our things.

We started off with a school at home approach and have moved to a relaxed school approach. Only the Lord knows where He'll take us next year. I do sense Him urging for a little bit more structure in the organization of the materials. Right now we each house our books in red bins. Maybe the will be moved to the bookshelf instead...HA!

My BIL brought us these desks and they have been a blessing. Although, I have not finished designing our homeschool room (area), we have been using the desks to see how realistic it will be for next year. Thus far, all of us are really enjoying them.

I have also gotten and looked through my tot's curriculum which I LOVE!!! I mean really there is nothing right now that I look at and think, "Ummm don't like that." It is really good and she is so excited to get started on it.

We finished the subtraction package we were working on and I have outlined the last two remaining series we'll be doing of Discipleland. I am so thankful to the Lord that He allowed us to do it. Come September, all three of us will be starting studying from Genesis through Deuteronomy together.

I placed an order for David Barton's American Heritage Series DVDs and am really excited to use those. I also think we'll be getting Drive Thru History America: Foundations of Character.
I really really enjoy history but especially American history, so I will have to use self-control on this one:)

We're just waiting on the Lord and really excited to see what He's doing and will do this upcoming year!