Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Instructing Words

The heart of the wise instructs his mouth And adds persuasiveness to his lips.
Proverbs 16:23 (NASB)

As a homeschooling mom, I think that most would think that instructing others would come naturally and even easy.

I will be the first to testify that the ability to teach is a gift of God. I will also be the first to admit that when it came to providing my husband with instruction, I got an F.

When he and I got married, we came from two different worlds. Things that I thought an adult should know and should come as common sense did not for my husband. And not because he was incapable of learning or did not want to learn--he had just not been exposed to balancing checkbooks, paying bills, and budgets.

So whenever I was overwhelmed with doing it all, he would offer to help. But of course, first he would have to learn. And this is when I would loose it. I would get so frustrated in instructing him, I would give up on him and do the task.

It hurt him.

Why wasn't I patient? Why wasn't I kind and gentle? Although, there were probably many reasons, one thing I looked at this morning was that I was not wise. My heart was not instructing my mouth, my emotions were. And now that's dangerous.

Emotions are fleeting, but the words out of my mouth can sting and leave damage in someone's heart past the endurance of those emotions. How could my husband receive any instruction from me, when the words out of mouth belittled him? How could he trust that I wanted his help when with my words I pushed him away?

He couldn't and he didn't.

Although today I have gotten a lot better at letting my heart instruct my mouth, I continue to pray that especially when it comes to my husband, I use my mouth to only speak life over him.

Previously, in our marriage, my husband would cringe at asking for my help or counsel. Now a days, he invites and welcomes it. Glory to God! If the Lord uses me to provide any type of instruction to my husband, I want it to come from a pure and wise heart, not an emotional one. I want my husband to know it is the Lord and not me speaking.

Father, I thank You for the gift of communication. I pray that I may use it wisely, that from my mouth only words of life may flow. Please help me not to speak from emotions but from Your Word. Help me to always trust that as long as it is You speaking through me, Your Word will not return void. I just want to be an instrument in Your hands. Use me as You please and help me to surrender my mouth to You. I thank You for what You've done in our marriage and continue to believe that the latter glory will be greater than the former. Yours is the glory now and forever, in Jesus' name. Amen.

She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her.
Proverbs 31:12 (AMP)

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May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14