Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Not An Option

Have you ever felt like a failure? looser? incompetent?

Last week, as I was scrubbing my bathtub I started thinking on the miracles God does in a human being. And since we celebrated our wedding anniversary on Saturday, I began to especially think on the miracle the Lord has done in me. Believe I am not boasting...all the glory is His! I boast in nothing but the cross.

When we had just gotten married, I was self-centered, spoiled, childish, immature, prideful, vengeful (you get the picture although the list can go on for a while see Galatians 5:19-21 for a clearer picture). The thought of me being a devoted wife and mother was the least thing on my mind. I considered serving weakness. I liked to call the shots. No need to help me, I could do it all on my own, because let's face it no one did it better than me anyways. I wasn't going to rely on anyone, let alone a man. Not me! Never!

But I remember when the Lord asked me to give up my teaching job and stay home. At that time our eldest daughter was six and in school. What was I going to do home all day by myself? I had forgotten that I had asked the Lord to make me a worshipper. And this was His time to do so. I didn't understand it and resisted Him. I would look at my husband and think and say at times, "You have it so easy, anyone can go and work a 9-5. I could work a 9-5 come home and still do everything in the house without a problem!" How arrogant. And in all reality I probably could have done it but without love, joy, or peace.

I didn't like staying home because I had to admit I was a failure of a wife and mother and daughter of God. It was all about me and not about God.


Fast forward some six years, I am scrubbing my bathtub thinking, "I want the house to look beautiful for when Hubby comes home. I want him to do the least amount of work because I realize (and am so thankful) he is such a hard worker." No more complaining. No more failure.

In that time period, I had to confront myself and come to the understanding and revelation that not only could I not be a successful wife and mother but that I should not want to one without the Lord. He created me to be His daughter, a wife, a mother, and now once again a teacher. I am no longer a looser, failure, or incompetent. In Him, I am victorious, triumphant, and capable. Because in Him and only in Him, failure is not an option.

Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and maketh manifest the savour of his knowledge by us in every place.
2 Corinthians 2:14

5 comments:

  1. How wonderful are the ways of our Lord. Through the blood of Jesus we are restored and renewed. We are more than conquerers!

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  2. I feel blessed and honor before the Lord to see his miracle manifested in your life "front row seat". It is amazing that when we look back it is not that we like to think of who we were or how things were, but more like our own personal "cronicles" on what God has done in our lives. He definitely is a miracle worker. He has done it in our marriage and in your life. You truly are His daughter, redeemed and transform into His image and likeness at heart. Praise be to God and all the Glory is His.... I rejoice on what He's done and what is so owesome is that He doesn't favor anyone, If He's done if for you and our marriage then there is Hope for all those who seek Him. Glory to God.... Halelujah!!! Jesus is Lord...

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  3. Only the Lord!!! It's not by power nor by strength but by His Holy Spirit!!!!

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  4. God Bless you sister, Praise God for the work that he has done in your life and marriage. When someone surrenders their all, God is always willing and able to transform us. I am still praying that he continue working in me because God knows i need it. But, i thank God that I am not where i used to be, and one thing i have to say is that i need him now more than ever and i am putting all my trust in him. HALLELUJAH!

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  5. Amen Maria, I need Him more than ever and want to surrender it ALL to him. I don't want to ever loose that-knowing I need Him in Jesus' name!

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May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14