Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Looking Back but Going Forward

Behold, I am doing a new thing! 
Now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it and will you not give heed to it?
 I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.  
Isaiah 43:19

Last night, as my sister and I walked and talked (we always have a great time out together and make each other laugh, we have those inside childhood jokes that only a sibling could get) and we started talking about the marriage classes we have been taking.  

The classes have blessed our marriage TREMENDOUSLY!  By nature, I like to look for new and better ways of doing things in most things I do (not a perfectionist but neither a conformist). So, I definitely want our marriage to improve.  During the classes, hubby and I would sometimes start laughing remembering things we use to do and I too at times felt like crying remembering where the Lord has brought our marriage from.  

I remember specifically the first time I attempted to make locrio for the family. I got the recipe from my MIL (a wonderful cook) and was so excited at this new endeavor.  However, when all was done, it was, well, a bit on the soggy side.  I remembered crying and crying as a new bride feeling like a failure and my husband consoling me and encouraging me.  He's great at that so much so that he ate the food (it wasn't inedible, it just wasn't my MIL's). I didn't even eat it. I remember looking at him, like he was crazy for eating it and just trying to patronize me.  Back then, I couldn't appreciate his thoughtfulness, encouragement, and much less love.  

Today, I look back on that incident and thank God for the man of God he has loaned me. Today, I can appreciate how he looks for ways to encourage me,  how he is detailed in the way he shows me Jesus' love, how he is purposefully looking for ways to help me.  Today, I can appreciate that he is a child of God, a man of God, my brother in Christ, my husband, and a father to our children. So as I look back remembering the Lord's goodness upon our life, I  am also thankful that we are moving forward.  Yes, today, I am grateful that we can look back but move forward!

Father, I thank You that today I can look back and there is no longer pain and hurt but thankfulness that in the midst of it all, You never left us.  You brought us through it all with love and mercy that I don't fully comprehend, but fully accept.  Thank you for not giving up on us and keeping us together and helping us to grow in You and together.  I pray that you continue to take us from glory to glory for Your name's sake and that You would minister us in such a way that we will always want to grow in You and want Your hand upon our lives. Deliver us from being conformed with anything less than Your most perfect will for our lives, marriage, and families, in the name of Jesus. Amen.

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May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14